Slow things down dating


01-Jan-2018 23:55

I also told him if he didn’t see things going anywhere, he needed to let me know and I would do the same for him.

Well, almost a month later, he makes sure to lock in the weekend plans with me early in the week and always has something fun and exciting planned.

Harsh as this is going to sound – if someone has decided after three months of dating that less of what you’ve got going on is better, that’s not a good sign. Yes, there are people who fear the progression of relationships, no matter how slow and reasonable that progression may be. There are people who don’t consider the act of joining each other in multiple, consecutive sessions of food, beverage or activity dating. And when they do both those things, they behave like a couple. He/she wants to know whether or not it’s appropriate to invite him/her to – say – a wedding. It’s usually her, and my continued use of he/she has got to be more annoying than a little bit of blatant stereotyping, right? He didn’t know the lack of definition was an issue. He’s now feeling pressured to make a decision he’s really not prepared to make. Just eeeaassee up a bit sos to keep things even and easy and stress free. And, more importantly, why would you want to if you like the person? They prefer phrases like “hanging out with.” In the case of this example I’m making up, this guy and girl are not just hooking up. He/she would really enjoy posting some photos of the two of them together on the Facebook so that his/her friends/family can be assured that he/she is not going to die a lonely spinster (sorry, lonely bachelor just doesn’t have the same ring, annoyingly). Plus, he just got out of a relationship/is still reeling from his parents’ divorce/has an insanely busy work season coming up/might join that company soft ball team which would keep him tied up most nights so… If we aren't intentional about maintaining a safe pace, then by default we will speed.

It is wise for dating couples to take it slowly for several reasons.

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